The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.
Alan Watts
There are so many ways to ask for help. We just need to be aware of the signs.
I bumped into an old acquaintance recently.
On the surface successful in business, married, a Dad, good character, good company and a decent network of friends. Quite sociable and generally liked, an all-round good guy.
Sound familiar?
Under the surface, struggling for air, and feeling like he’s running out of oxygen, needing help.
Sound familiar?
The thing is. He asked for help and taken the first strong positive step.
Now, my only qualification in this area is life and experience having been in a similar situation to him. I needed help during my time and I was lucky to have people to share their life experiences with me and give me the tools I needed to refocus my mindset, zone in on the important things in my life and from time to time, provide encouragement and guidance.
Perception is not reality – most of the time
Asking for help is easier said than done. I find myself offering to help, yet when I go through tough personal challenges I tend to see asking for help as a last resort. Not exactly practicing what I preach. However, I am aware of this and I’m working to remove the fear of asking for help.
So, this guy, that I was talking to. I must say I tip my hat to him. He related to some of my blogs and rants. The words I wrote struck a chord with him. I’ve been clear and open when it comes to writing. My views are my own. I’ve jotted down my thoughts, worries, challenges and approaches with the view to give people an insight to me, a sample of what is under the surface in my world and he appreciated it.
Yes I’ve been ridiculed, yes I’ve received some negative comments and that’s fine. But with any negativity I’ve received, it is far outweighed by positivity and encouragement.
It is a natural human desire to be loved, or wish to be seen in a positive light. Yes there are people who say they don’t care what others think, however, those others are strangers. It’s the people within our inner circles, who’s views and opinions we respect, they are the ones we wish to show us love, positivity, honesty and respect.
It’s also natural for people to relate with others and create affinity with those who are ‘like me’ or going through similar challenges.
Society is changing. Society is helping and trying to understand what others are going through.
People like Bressie and Jack McGrath are leading the way in educating kids and importantly adults on mental health and how to tackle their feelings and manage them. They are people like you and me. Through traditional discussions, debates along with online platforms people are now learning from those who have been in their shoes. Whether your 18 or 80 you’re encouraged to talk.
It’s fantastic to see those guys using their public image to help others. But remember, you don’t need a public image to help, you can do it now for yourself or with others. Look around you, because the friend / acquaintance next to you could be that person who is looking for help, but afraid to ask, maybe it’s you. Don’t be afraid. It’s ok to ask for help
Which takes me back to the guy I met. He talked, he opened up, he asked for help, what a legend.
One by one, helping can lead to a happier, mentally healthier society.